Monday, November 3, 2008

I'm still stuck!

if you can't seem to shake your people-pleasing habits,try digging a little deeper to get to the root of the problem:

Be aware of your people-pleasing behaviour the moment it happens.One way to do this is to notice what you feel inside:if you tend to be compliment with your boyfriend when he is annoyed with you,the next tyme this happens,be especially alert.

Understand your behaviour and motivation.What do you do and how do you communicate with people?Do you avoid sepaking up? Do you get confused instead of angry? Do you always accept someone's perception of you? Do you give up your own needs to make them happy?

Be independent,work on knowing what you think,feel,and want.Express your desires or opinions.Stand your ground when others disagree with you.Realise other people may not always like what you say or do,and risk it anyway.

Uncover hidden aggression.Check to see if a part of you feels resentful.Are you angry at yourself for putting others first?Express your aggressive feelings,then find ways to turn them into healthy experssions of personal power

Choose supportive people who appericate you being yourself,who don't need to dominate or have their way,and who can handle differences and challenges.Pick people who will support you in becoming independent.

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